Cousin Eddie

"We spend Christmas together. It's tradition. You don't change tradition. Every other family is a mess during the holidays. Not us, we cruise right through it because we are consistent. We stick with what works."
— Jessica Huang to Eddie Huang

"Cousin Eddie" is the eighth episode of the fifth season of Fresh Off the Boat. It first aired on December 14, 2018.

Synopsis[]

The battle begins between mother and son when Eddie informs Jessica that he wants to spend Christmas with friend Nicole in New York. But Jessica insists that tradition prevails and he needs to spend the holiday with the family.

Plot[]

To be added

Cast[]

Main Cast[]

Randall Park as Louis Huang
Constance Wu as Jessica Huang
Hudson Yang as Eddie Huang
Forrest Wheeler as Emery Huang
Ian Chen as Evan Huang
Lucille Soong as Jenny Huang (credited as Grandma Huang)
Chelsey Crisp as Honey Ellis (absent; credit only)
Ray Wise as Marvin Ellis (absent; credit only)

Recurring Cast[]

Luke Judy as Zack

Guest Cast[]

Mary Holland as Cindy
Diego Alexander as Caleb
Elyssa Phillips as Janet
Fitz Houston as Stan

Trivia[]

Eddie's height is revealed to be 6'2.
According to the promotional images released, there was initially a scene during The Nutcracker play that featured an imaginary older Eddie.

Quotes[]

Louis: Ugh, that shadow's back, and it's not doing us any favors. Should we bring the lamp in again?
Jessica: Enough with the lamp, enough with the shadow. Let's do this already.
Louis: Sorry, but it's gotta be just right. Plus, I'm a dad. Taking forever with a camera is a part of my brand.

Eddie: This is so dumb. We take the same Christmas card photo every year.
Emery: And every year, our smiles are a little different.
Eddie: Yeah, but these old pajamas aren't, and they're riding up the ol' chimney.
Evan: Well, deal with it, ya scrooge. Look at us. I don't normally toss out this word, but we're real cute.
Eddie: Maybe instead of cute, we go for funny this year. Evan and Emery can pretend these lights are handcuffs, and I'll be like, "No, I'm innocent!"
Jessica: Save your pranks for Halloween. Christmas is about tradition.
Louis: Don't bring Halloween into this. Halloween has no dog in this fight.

Eddie: Nicole sent me an ornament that tells a story, too, how there is no truer common ground between a lesbian and a 15-year-old boy than the movie Wild Things.
Jessica: We're not hanging that on the tree.
Eddie: Fine, I'll just put it over my bed.
Evan: Why?
Eddie: ...

Jessica: So, since Honey, Marvin, and Nicole are in New York this year, we have three empty seats we need to fill for Christmas Eve dinner.
Louis: We could do just the six of us.
Jessica: We could do a thousand things, but what we're gonna do is what we always do, which is nine people.
Louis: I just thought it might be easier...
Jessica: Save your bad ideas for Halloween. I am in charge of Christmas, and my reindeer plate set is for nine people. We can't just leave out Donner, Blitzen, and Rudolph. So, each one of you boys can bring one friend. Eddie is bringing Trevor.
Emery: You mean Trent?
Jessica: Sure.

Jessica: What's your game, Huang?
Eddie: Okay, I realized that New York was too big a swing. So, I thought I could help you get rid of your fear of change–
Jessica: I don't fear change. I hate it.
Eddie: Right, but if we start smaller, you might see that change can actually be fun.
Jessica: You're not going to New York by yourself. You're still a kid.
Eddie: I'm not a kid. I have shoulder hair.
Jessica: Please, you still watch Ben and Jerry.
Eddie: Tom and Jerry, and I haven't watched that cartoon since I was eight years old.
Jessica: So why do you care about their names so much?
Eddie: Okay, you don't have to decide on New York right now, but at least consider candy cane brownies.
Jessica: Let me ask you a question. Do you hate Christmas?
Eddie: No, I love it. It's my favorite.
Jessica: You know why that is? Because I spent years perfecting it. We have our set plan – Miracle on 34th Street, The Nutcracker ballet, snowman pancakes, and the hour where I sing along with Bing Crosby after Christmas dinner.
Eddie: Wait, we're still doing The Nutcracker? I thought we were done with that snooze-fest.
Jessica: Oh, we only skipped last year because the playhouse decided to do a Disney-themed "Nutcracker". Sugar plum Goofy, no thank you.
Eddie: Well, can I at least skip the ballet this year? I mean, no need to spend 50 bucks for me to fall asleep. Come on, be a little flexible.
Jessica: Flexibility is not what Christmas is about. Commitment and tradition are. No New York, no brownies.

Jessica: [to Eddie] You put your porno ornament on my angel?!
Cindy: Porno ornament? Or pornament.

Evan: [to Louis] You and Emery are both indecisive. The difference is you have Mommy. So I decided to be Emery's Mommy. Wait, wife? Husband? Decision-maker.

Louis: You don't have one go-to friend, you have a whole bunch. And a great wife.
Evan: Thanks, Dad.
Louis: It's just like It's a Wonderful Life.
Emery: Except you should all go. It's Christmas Eve.

Eddie: I'm really sorry I was such a jerk.
Jessica: You're not a jerk. You're Eddie and I'm me. So this is gonna happen sometimes. Look, I know you were upset about New York–
Eddie: It wasn't just New York. You weren't open to even the smallest change.
Jessica: Listen, Eddie. When you were first born, your dad was working a lot and I was overwhelmed being a new mother. I didn't know if I was doing a good job or not. But then our first Christmas, you and I had all these fun times together.
Eddie: Our first Christmas card photo. Man, I was a cute-ass baby.
Jessica: We watched Miracle on 34th Street, and you fell asleep on me listening to The Nutcracker.
Eddie: That's why it makes me so sleepy!
Jessica: And when you first saw this angel, you were laughing non-stop. It was the best sound. It made everything feel okay. It still does.
Eddie: Now I get why you don't want to change all these traditions.
Jessica: That, and letting you make new traditions means admitting that you're growing up. And that is the change I am really not ready for. But I guess it's gonna happen no matter how stubborn I am.
Eddie: Sounds to me like someone's coming around on Christmas brownies. Smashy smashy some canes?
Jessica: Okay. But we're not gonna call them "reindeer patties."
Eddie: We'll revisit this.
Jessica: No, we won't.
Eddie: And the dance begins.
Jessica: And the dance begins.

Gallery[]

Episodes

Fresh Off the Boat – Season One

Episode 1 "Pilot"	Episode 2 "Home Sweet Home-School"	Episode 3 "The Shunning"	Episode 4 "Success Perm"


Episode 5 "Persistent Romeo"	Episode 6 "Fajita Man"	Episode 7 "Showdown at the Golden Saddle"	Episode 8 "Phillip Goldstein"


Episode 9 "License to Sell"	Episode 10 "Blind Spot"	Episode 11 "Very Superstitious"	Episode 12 "Dribbling Tiger, Bounce Pass Dragon"


Episode 13 So Chineez

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Two

Episode 1 "Family Business Trip"	Episode 2 "Boy II Man"	Episode 3 "Shaquille O'Neal Motors"	Episode 4 "The Fall Ball"


Episode 5 "Miracle on Dead Street"	Episode 6 "Good Morning Orlando"	Episode 7 "The Big 1-2"	Episode 8 "Huangsgiving"


Episode 9 "We Done Son"	Episode 10 "The Real Santa"	Episode 11 "Year of the Rat"	Episode 12 "Love and Loopholes"


Episode 13 "Phil's Phaves"	Episode 14 "Michael Chang Fever"	Episode 15 "Keep 'Em Separated"	Epsiode 16 "Tight Two"


Episode 17 "Doing It Right"	Episode 18 "Week in Review"	Episode 19 "Jessica Place"	Episode 20 "Hi, My Name Is..."


Episode 21 "Rent Day"	Episode 22 "Gotta Be Me"	Episode 23 "The Manchurian Dinner Date"	Episode 24 "Bring the Pain"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Three

Episode 1 "Coming from America"	Episode 2 "Breaking Chains"	Episode 3 "Louisween"	Episode 4 "Citizen Jessica"


Episode 5 "No Thanks-giving"	Episode 6 "WWJD: What Would Jessica Do?"	Episode 7 "The Taming of the Dads"	Episode 8 "Where are the Giggles?"


Episode 9 "How to Be an American"	Episode 10 "The Best of Orlando"	Episode 11 "Clean Slate"	Episode 12 "Sisters Without Subtext"


Episode 13 "Neighbors with Attitude"	Episode 14 "The Gloves Are Off"	Episode 15 "Living While Eddie"	Episode 16 "Gabby Goose"

	]
Episode 17 "The Flush"	Episode 18 "Time to Get Ill"	Episode 19 "Driving Miss Jenny"	Episode 20 "The Masters"


Episode 21 "Pie vs. Cake"	Episode 22 "This Is Us"	Episode 23 "This Isn't Us"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Four

Episode 1 "B as in Best Friends"	Episode 2 "First Day"	Episode 3 "Kids"	Episode 4 "It's a Plastic Pumpkin, Louis Huang"

Episode 5 "Four Funerals and a Wedding"	Episode 6 "A League of Her Own"	Episode 7 "The Day After Thanksgiving"	Episode 8 "The Vouch"

Episode 9 "Slide Effect"	Episode 10 "Do You Hear What I Hear?"	Episode 11 "Big Baby"	Episode 12 "Liar Liar"

Episode 13 "The Car Wash"	Episode 14 "A Man to Share the Night With"	Episode 15 "We Need to Talk About Evan"	Episode 16 "Ride the Tiger"

Episode 17 "Let Me Go, Bro"	Episode 18 "Measure Twice, Cut Once"	Episode 19 "King in the North"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Five

Episode 1 "Fresh Off the RV"	Episode 2 "The Hand That Sits the Cradle"	Episode 3 "Working the 'Ween"	Episode 4 "Driver's Eddie"
Episode 5 "Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems"	Episode 6 "Sub Standard"	Episode 7 "Where Have All the Cattlemen Gone?"	Episode 8 "Cousin Eddie"
Episode 9 "Just the Two of Us"	Episode 10 "You've Got a Girlfriend"	Episode 11 "Driver's Eddie 2: Orlando Drift"	Episode 12 "Legends of the Fortieth"
Episode 13 "Grand-Mahjong"	Episode 14 "Cupid's Crossbow"	Episode 15 "Be a Man"	Episode 16 "Trentina"
Episode 17 "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'"	Episode 18 "Rancho Contento"	Episode 19 "Vice Mommy"	Episode 20 "Nerd Watching"
Episode 21 "Under the Taipei Sun"	Episode 22 "No Apology Necessary"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Six

Episode 1 "Help Unwanted?"	Episode 2 "College"	Episode 3 "Grandma's Boys"	Episode 4 "S'Mothered"
Episode 5 "Hal-Lou-Ween"	Episode 6 "Chestnut Gardens"	Episode 7 "Practicum?!"	Episode 8 "TMI: Too Much Integrity"
Episode 9 "Lou Wants to Be a Millionaire"	Episode 10 "Jessica Town"	Episode 11 "A Seat at the Table"	Episode 12 "The Magic Motor Inn"
Episode 13 "Mommy and Me"	Episode 14 "Family Van"	Episode 15 "Commencement"