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"I only call you Will Smith because you're a good kid. And you're lucky. You don't have to live a hard life unless you want to."
Jenny Huang to Eddie Huang

"Just the Two of Us" is the ninth episode of the fifth season of Fresh Off the Boat. It first aired on January 4, 2019.

Synopsis[]

Louis and Jessica think they've won a weekend getaway at a posh resort, but instead they're stuck at a marriage retreat where troubled couples work out their relationship problems with the help of Guru Sheela.

Plot[]

To be added

Cast[]

Main Cast[]

Recurring Cast[]

Guest Cast[]

  • June Diane Raphael as Guru Sheela
  • Hina Abdullah as Kelly
  • Chris Witaske as Ken
  • Pamela Hill as Penguin Couple
  • William Joseph Hill as Penguin Couple

Trivia[]

Quotes[]

Eddie: A person is making this noise?
Jenny: An angel.
Eddie: I'm changing it back.
Jenny: I can slap all day.
Jessica: I knew we could do it, we are a well-oiled machine. Like B2-D2.
Jessica: From 2:00 to 2:30, we're washing each other's areolas?
Kelly: Auras. The emanation of our souls.
Jessica: Ugh! That is even worse.
Eddie: We should go get gas. Better to be safe than sorry. Speaking of safe, I know you didn't like my rap music before, but that was because I should've eased you in. Introducing Will Smith. He's the horseradish of rap. He never cusses, and he only raps about soft stuff like aliens, summertime, and going to Miami.
Jenny: ...I will allow it.
Eddie: Awesome. And when you're ready, we'll go up the rap chain – Mase, Puff Daddy, Jay-Z, DMX, until we get to Biggie. He's the toughest guy out there. He's kinda who I take after, you know.
Jenny: Really? You're not Biggie. You're Will Smith – soft.
Jessica: Louis and I are like a well-oiled machine. We're not like the other suckers that paid to be here.
Louis: I mean, uh, this place is lovely and you seem very sweet, but–
Jessica: We don't need this garbage.
Guru Sheela: I think you do. The greater the resistance, the greater the need.
Jessica: That sounds like some commie bulls–
Louis: Okay, you know what? We're... We're gonna, uh, hit the guava station, and then we'll be back.
Guru Sheela: I have to go say good morning to the sun.
Jessica: Of course you do.
Sandturtles Employee: Welcome all to Sandturtles, the preeminent healing place for broken couples. Together, we are going to find the nexus of all of your problems.
Jessica: Is there a trophy for the winner?
Sandturtles Employee: Well, my hope is that by the end of the retreat, you'll all be winners and that the trophy you'll leave with is the partner you came with.
Jessica: You could've just said no.
Eddie: Can you believe Grandma said I was Will Smith? She called me soft!
Evan: A lot of great things are soft – pillows, marshmallows...
Emery: Gnocchi.
Evan: We could go on all day.
Eddie: I'm sure you could, because you're soft. But I'm not! On my first day of school, a kid insulted me, and I smashed his hand in a microwave. I'm hardcore. That's me. That's who I am.
Evan: I don't see what the big deal is.
Eddie: How would you like it if Grandma called you... disorganized? Exactly.
Jenny: 埃迪,我剛剛聽了我們的歌,"Just the Two of Us".[1]
Eddie: How is that our song?
Jenny: 因為這是關於我們的。 我是孩子,你是 Fresh Prince.[2]
Eddie: Grandma, I am not Will Smith. Will Smith is for softies, like Evan and Emery.
Jenny: 每次油箱不足一半時,您都會感到恐慌。[3]
Eddie: It's better to be safe than s...
Jenny: Oh, is that one of Biggie's rap lines? 也許你甚至都不 Will Smith... 你是 Carlton.[4]
Evan: What? But I'm Carlton.
Emery: Cool outfit, Eddie.
Evan: Yeah, looking fly! Oof, as soon as I said that, I knew it wasn't me.
Eddie: Thanks, boys. Gotta rep hard at Trent's b-day, ya know?
Jenny: Oh, please.
Eddie: Grandma, you got to check it. You don't understand me at all.
Jenny: Isn't that a Will Smith song, "Grandparents Just Don't Understand"?
Eddie: For the last time, I am not Will Smith. If anyone is soft around here, it's you. You read cartoons every day. And my mom paints your fingernails. Now let's go. I don't want to be late for Trent's birthday.
Jenny: I'm not coming.
Eddie: What? But I can't drive without you.
Jenny: I have cartoons to read.
Eddie: You know what? Fine. Biggie wouldn't need his grandmother anyways. I can drive my damn self.
Jenny: When you've lived a hard life, you'd rather not be reminded of it.
Eddie: So that's why you like soft stuff, like Garfield and Will Smith.
Jenny: I only call you Will Smith because you're a good kid. And you're lucky. You don't have to live a hard life unless you want to.
Eddie: Okay, Grandma, let's kick this off Big Willie-style. Hey! What was that for?
Jenny: You're tougher than I thought. You have graduated to Mase.

Gallery[]

References[]

  1. Eddie, I just listened to our song, "Just the Two of Us".
  2. Because I'm the kid, and you're the Fresh Prince.
  3. Every time the gas tank is less than half full, you panic.
  4. Oh, is that one of Biggie's rap lines? Maybe you're not even Will Smith... you're Carlton.
Episodes
Fresh Off the Boat – Season One
Pilot Home Sweet Home-School The Shunning Success Perm
Episode 1
"Pilot"
Episode 2
"Home Sweet Home-School"
Episode 3
"The Shunning"
Episode 4
"Success Perm"
Persistent Romeo Fajita Man Showdown at the Golden Corrall Phillip Goldstein
Episode 5
"Persistent Romeo"
Episode 6
"Fajita Man"
Episode 7
"Showdown at the Golden Saddle"
Episode 8
"Phillip Goldstein"
License to Sell Blind Spot Very Superstitious DTBPD1
Episode 9
"License to Sell"
Episode 10
"Blind Spot"
Episode 11
"Very Superstitious"
Episode 12
"Dribbling Tiger, Bounce Pass Dragon"
So Chineez
Episode 13
So Chineez
Fresh Off the Boat – Season Two
Family Business Trip Boy 2 Man Shaquille O Neal Motors The Fall ball Dance
Episode 1
"Family Business Trip"
Episode 2
"Boy II Man"
Episode 3
"Shaquille O'Neal Motors"
Episode 4
"The Fall Ball"
Miracle on dead stret Fresh-off-the-boat The Big 1-2 Huangsgiving
Episode 5
"Miracle on Dead Street"
Episode 6
"Good Morning Orlando"
Episode 7
"The Big 1-2"
Episode 8
"Huangsgiving"
We Done Son The Real Samta YOTR Image
Episode 9
"We Done Son"
Episode 10
"The Real Santa"
Episode 11
"Year of the Rat"
Episode 12
"Love and Loopholes"
Phil's Phaves MCF Keep 'Em Separated Tight Two
Episode 13
"Phil's Phaves"
Episode 14
"Michael Chang Fever"
Episode 15
"Keep 'Em Separated"
Epsiode 16
"Tight Two"
Doing it Right Week in Review Jessica Place My Name is
Episode 17
"Doing It Right"
Episode 18
"Week in Review"
Episode 19
"Jessica Place"
Episode 20
"Hi, My Name Is..."
Rent Day Gotta Be Me The Manchurian Dinner Date Bring the Pain
Episode 21
"Rent Day"
Episode 22
"Gotta Be Me"
Episode 23
"The Manchurian Dinner Date"
Episode 24
"Bring the Pain"
Fresh Off the Boat – Season Three
FOTB GOes to Taiwan Breaking Chains Lance Ito, Indiana Jones & Pete Vampras Precinct 42
Episode 1
"Coming from America"
Episode 2
"Breaking Chains"
Episode 3
"Louisween"
Episode 4
"Citizen Jessica"
Turkey slaughter Praying Evan Smaller Taming of the Dads Evan (Kevin McCallister)
Episode 5
"No Thanks-giving"
Episode 6
"WWJD: What Would Jessica Do?"
Episode 7
"The Taming of the Dads"
Episode 8
"Where are the Giggles?"
How to Be an American Louis on TV Chinese Lunar New Year Dinner (Clean Slate) Connie & Jessica (3x12)
Episode 9
"How to Be an American"
Episode 10
"The Best of Orlando"
Episode 11
"Clean Slate"
Episode 12
"Sisters Without Subtext"
Alison & Eddie (3x13) Evan & Honey Eddie & Evan (3x15) Marvin & Honey (3x16)
Episode 13
"Neighbors with Attitude"
Episode 14
"The Gloves Are Off"
Episode 15
"Living While Eddie"
Episode 16
"Gabby Goose"
The Flush Jessica & Honey (3x18)] Jenny (3x19) Evan sucks at golfing
Episode 17
"The Flush"
Episode 18
"Time to Get Ill"
Episode 19
"Driving Miss Jenny"
Episode 20
"The Masters"
Brother, Brother Michael Bolton & Louis Huang New House (3x23)
Episode 21
"Pie vs. Cake"
Episode 22
"This Is Us"
Episode 23
"This Isn't Us"
Fresh Off the Boat – Season Four
Episode 1
"B as in Best Friends"
Episode 2
"First Day"
Episode 3
"Kids"
Episode 4
"It's a Plastic Pumpkin, Louis Huang"
Episode 5
"Four Funerals and a Wedding"
Episode 6
"A League of Her Own"
Episode 7
"The Day After Thanksgiving"
Episode 8
"The Vouch"
Episode 9
"Slide Effect"
Episode 10
"Do You Hear What I Hear?"
Episode 11
"Big Baby"
Episode 12
"Liar Liar"
Episode 13
"The Car Wash"
Episode 14
"A Man to Share the Night With"
Episode 15
"We Need to Talk About Evan"
Episode 16
"Ride the Tiger"
Episode 17
"Let Me Go, Bro"
Episode 18
"Measure Twice, Cut Once"
Episode 19
"King in the North"
Fresh Off the Boat – Season Five
Episode 1
"Fresh Off the RV"
Episode 2
"The Hand That Sits the Cradle"
Episode 3
"Working the 'Ween"
Episode 4
"Driver's Eddie"
Episode 5
"Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems"
Episode 6
"Sub Standard"
Episode 7
"Where Have All the Cattlemen Gone?"
Episode 8
"Cousin Eddie"
Episode 9
"Just the Two of Us"
Episode 10
"You've Got a Girlfriend"
Episode 11
"Driver's Eddie 2: Orlando Drift"
Episode 12
"Legends of the Fortieth"
Episode 13
"Grand-Mahjong"
Episode 14
"Cupid's Crossbow"
Episode 15
"Be a Man"
Episode 16
"Trentina"
Episode 17
"These Boots Are Made for Walkin'"
Episode 18
"Rancho Contento"
Episode 19
"Vice Mommy"
Episode 20
"Nerd Watching"
Episode 21
"Under the Taipei Sun"
Episode 22
"No Apology Necessary"
Fresh Off the Boat – Season Six
Episode 1
"Help Unwanted?"
Episode 2
"College"
Episode 3
"Grandma's Boys"
Episode 4
"S'Mothered"
Episode 5
"Hal-Lou-Ween"
Episode 6
"Chestnut Gardens"
Episode 7
"Practicum?!"
Episode 8
"TMI: Too Much Integrity"
Episode 9
"Lou Wants to Be a Millionaire"
Episode 10
"Jessica Town"
Episode 11
"A Seat at the Table"
Episode 12
"The Magic Motor Inn"
Episode 13
"Mommy and Me"
Episode 14
"Family Van"
Episode 15
"Commencement"
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