Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems

"There's another Chinese family in the neighborhood!"
— Louis Huang to Jessica Huang

"Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems" is the fifth episode of the fifth season of Fresh Off the Boat. It first aired on November 9, 2018.

Synopsis[]

Jessica and Louis are thrilled beyond belief when they discover that a Chinese family - Elaine, Julius and son, Horace - have moved into the neighborhood. Jessica immediately bonds with Elaine, who helps her solve an issue with the HOA, and Louis decides to introduce Julius to Marvin and hang out together. Meanwhile, when Evan goes door-to-door collecting information for the census bureau, Eddie and Emery come up with a plan to impersonate being census takers in order to find out when the owners of a pool are out of the house so they can sneak over and use it.

Plot[]

To be added

Cast[]

Main Cast[]

Randall Park as Louis Huang
Constance Wu as Jessica Huang
Hudson Yang as Eddie Huang
Forrest Wheeler as Emery Huang
Ian Chen as Evan Huang
Lucille Soong as Jenny Huang (absent; credited only, as Grandma Huang)
Chelsey Crisp as Honey Ellis
Ray Wise as Marvin Ellis

Recurring Cast[]

Rachel Cannon as Deidre Sanderson
Kimberly Crandall as Lisa
Colleen Ryan as Amanda

Guest Cast[]

Reggie Lee as Julius Lee
Jimmy O. Yang as Horace Lee
Ming-Na Wen as Elaine Lee
Rachel Andersen as Homeowner
Fred Cross as Bruce
Harmony Jupiter as Housing Association Lady (uncredited)

Trivia[]

Ming-Na Wen, who portrays Elaine Lee in this episode, previously portrayed Louis' friend Stephanie in "The Flush".
Eddie's middle name is revealed to be "Elvis". Additionally, Emery is revealed to not have a middle name.

Quotes[]

Evan: Dad, Dad!
Louis: Evan, are you okay?
Evan: I don't know. I saw something.
Louis: What happened? What'd you see?
Evan: I saw... other Chinese people.

Deidre: This year, we're gonna be taking donations to refurbish the "We Are The World" mural at the Community Center.
Jessica: Why are all the kids white? I've got a better idea, tear down this racist mural so we can move on to addressing the epidemic that is destroying our neighborhood.
Deidre: And what, pray tell, might that be?
Jessica: Three words. Low rise jeans. This trendy jean is a menace. Every time I step outside, all I see are Whale tails.
Deidre: Whale tails?
Jessica: T-shaped underwear sticking out the top of jeans. It's disgusting.
Deidre: Jessica, the HOA cannot enforce a dress code. And frankly, if beautiful celebrities like Rene Russo can wear them, then so can the beautiful mamas in this subdivision. Am I right?
Jessica: I'm surrounded by tramps.

Jessica: So how are you liking Orlando?
Elaine: Oh, I love it, but the humidity is killing my hair. I'm usually four times more beautiful than this.
Jessica: Me too. But the reduction in beauty means less Jewish guys hit on me at the gas pump.

Elaine: Oh, you're a lifesaver. I'll have my son, Horace, pick some up for me.
Jessica: Oh, you have a son, too! I have three – Eddie, Emery, and Evan.
Elaine: Three sons? Oh, you must be so proud.
Jessica: Well, the first two are... solid. But my youngest, Evan, he's a real genius. He recently skipped a grade.
Elaine: Sounds just like my Horace. He skipped two grades, went to Harvard at 16, and now runs his own small business.
Jessica: You're living the dream.

Julius: I love that you opened an American steakhouse.
Louis: Well, you know, I'm Chinese through and through but I'm 100% American.
Julius: Oh, me too. I mean, if I had a choice, I'd eat apple pie for breakfast.
Louis: My favorite cut of steak is "any."
Julius: When asked if I'm religious, I say I believe in the Dallas Cowboys.
Louis: My firstborn's middle name is "Elvis."
Julius: When I'm on hold on the phone, I doodle bald eagles on a notepad.
Louis: When the wife and kids are out of town, I roll my own cigarettes, and I light them with a match I strike off my boot.

Jessica: My HOA wanted to refurbish a "We Are The World" mural that only has white children in it.
Elaine: Ugh.
Jessica: I voted to tear it down, but they don't see the problem.
Elaine: Forget tearing it down. Make them add an Asian face to it.
Jessica: Trust me, my HOA has more white ladies than a Neil Diamond concert, except they're not aroused, they're bitter, and they won't listen.
Elaine: Oh, they will this time. Now that there's two of us here, we can set them up for a racism trap.
Jessica: I hate racism, and I love a trap. Tell me more.

Jessica: I've never met someone like her, you know, someone who is almost my equal. We're so in sync, like that music group, Backstreet Boys.

Evan: Hi, my name is Evan Huang, and I'm with the U.S. Census.
Homeowner: Another Census questionnaire? I just answered one yesterday with two other Asian kids. Sorry, I can't handle any more questions about my pool.
Evan: Pool? Lord, give me strength, for I am a quivering volcano of rage.

Elaine: It's embarrassing, but most of our wall space is dedicated to Horace. And here's his diploma.
Jessica: [internally] Okay, at least the degree is real.
Elaine: Horace Lee. Bachelor's Degree in Art. Isn't it amazing?
Jessica: [internally] Art? You spent 200 grand on an art degree?
Elaine: And it didn't cost us a dime. He got a full scholarship.
Jessica: [internally] Oh, at least it didn't cost them anything.
Elaine: He started off as Pre-Med, but then switched majors.
Jessica: [internally] It cost him everything!
Elaine: Oh, and this, in my opinion, is his finest work. Bill Gates offered him quite a lot to buy it. But Horace refused to sell. He doesn't believe in commercializing his creativity.
Jessica: [internally] Horace is a dud! Elaine completely misled me.
Elaine: Jessica, the way you're staring at me, I'm sensing a lot of judgment.
Jessica: I haven't said anything judgmental.
Elaine: Your face and posture say it all.
Jessica: [internally] Betrayed by my beautiful face.
Elaine: You're wondering why you took parenting advice from me when you disapprove of my son so much.
Jessica: [internally] She's in my head. Uh, what do I do, what do I do, what do I do?
Elaine: Horace might not be your idea of a success, but I'm proud of him, and you have no right to judge.
Jessica: [internally] I should leave.
Elaine: Yes, you should.
Jessica: [internally] How did she hear that?

Eddie: How much time till we move to the Gibsons' pool?
Emery: According to our data, we have four hours till the owners come home.
Evan: Incorrect! Your time is up!
Eddie: How did you... What're you talking about? It-It's our friend's pool.
Evan: Cut the crap, Edwyn.
Emery: Relax, it's a victimless crime.
Evan: Victimless? The people's trust in the Census has been eroded.
Eddie: I'm sorry, bro, we're not leaving.
Evan: [using a megaphone] Eddie Elvis Huang sleeps with a stuffed animal. Emery No-Middle-Name Huang waxes his chest.
Emery: Whoa, whoa, what are you doing?
Evan: If you don't get out of this pool, I'm visiting the houses of everyone you know and announcing more embarrassing facts.

Jessica: Elaine totally misled me on her son. To think I almost thought she was my equal.
Louis: I'm out on the Lee family, too. I think Julius is trying to hijack my friendship with Marvin. He comes into my house my house and disrespects me like that?
Jessica: Al Pacino?
Louis: No, that's not a Pacino impression. That's just me being angry.

Jessica: This isn't okay. It doesn't matter if it's a good stereotype. A stereotype is a stereotype. Yes, some Chinese kids enjoy schoolwork. But some also want to be rappers, tennis players or great painters. Their parents are proud of them for what they are and just want to see them represented that way. Wouldn't you want the same for your own kids?

Jessica: You know, we might not always get along, but you were right. If nothing else, we have each other's backs. I'm sorry I judged you and your cabbie-artist son. And if he's willing, I think Horace should be the one to fix the mural.
Horace: He'd be honored. I'll ask him when his harmonica lesson gets out.
Jessica: [internally] Yikes.
Elaine: [internally] I know.

Jessica: You did a great job, Horace.
Horace: Thanks, Jessica. By the way, I saw your book in the dollar bin. No shame in that. I bought it and loved it. You and me, we're not so different, right? Just two Chinese artists.

Gallery[]

Episodes

Fresh Off the Boat – Season One

Episode 1 "Pilot"	Episode 2 "Home Sweet Home-School"	Episode 3 "The Shunning"	Episode 4 "Success Perm"


Episode 5 "Persistent Romeo"	Episode 6 "Fajita Man"	Episode 7 "Showdown at the Golden Saddle"	Episode 8 "Phillip Goldstein"


Episode 9 "License to Sell"	Episode 10 "Blind Spot"	Episode 11 "Very Superstitious"	Episode 12 "Dribbling Tiger, Bounce Pass Dragon"


Episode 13 So Chineez

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Two

Episode 1 "Family Business Trip"	Episode 2 "Boy II Man"	Episode 3 "Shaquille O'Neal Motors"	Episode 4 "The Fall Ball"


Episode 5 "Miracle on Dead Street"	Episode 6 "Good Morning Orlando"	Episode 7 "The Big 1-2"	Episode 8 "Huangsgiving"


Episode 9 "We Done Son"	Episode 10 "The Real Santa"	Episode 11 "Year of the Rat"	Episode 12 "Love and Loopholes"


Episode 13 "Phil's Phaves"	Episode 14 "Michael Chang Fever"	Episode 15 "Keep 'Em Separated"	Epsiode 16 "Tight Two"


Episode 17 "Doing It Right"	Episode 18 "Week in Review"	Episode 19 "Jessica Place"	Episode 20 "Hi, My Name Is..."


Episode 21 "Rent Day"	Episode 22 "Gotta Be Me"	Episode 23 "The Manchurian Dinner Date"	Episode 24 "Bring the Pain"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Three

Episode 1 "Coming from America"	Episode 2 "Breaking Chains"	Episode 3 "Louisween"	Episode 4 "Citizen Jessica"


Episode 5 "No Thanks-giving"	Episode 6 "WWJD: What Would Jessica Do?"	Episode 7 "The Taming of the Dads"	Episode 8 "Where are the Giggles?"


Episode 9 "How to Be an American"	Episode 10 "The Best of Orlando"	Episode 11 "Clean Slate"	Episode 12 "Sisters Without Subtext"


Episode 13 "Neighbors with Attitude"	Episode 14 "The Gloves Are Off"	Episode 15 "Living While Eddie"	Episode 16 "Gabby Goose"

	]
Episode 17 "The Flush"	Episode 18 "Time to Get Ill"	Episode 19 "Driving Miss Jenny"	Episode 20 "The Masters"


Episode 21 "Pie vs. Cake"	Episode 22 "This Is Us"	Episode 23 "This Isn't Us"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Four

Episode 1 "B as in Best Friends"	Episode 2 "First Day"	Episode 3 "Kids"	Episode 4 "It's a Plastic Pumpkin, Louis Huang"

Episode 5 "Four Funerals and a Wedding"	Episode 6 "A League of Her Own"	Episode 7 "The Day After Thanksgiving"	Episode 8 "The Vouch"

Episode 9 "Slide Effect"	Episode 10 "Do You Hear What I Hear?"	Episode 11 "Big Baby"	Episode 12 "Liar Liar"

Episode 13 "The Car Wash"	Episode 14 "A Man to Share the Night With"	Episode 15 "We Need to Talk About Evan"	Episode 16 "Ride the Tiger"

Episode 17 "Let Me Go, Bro"	Episode 18 "Measure Twice, Cut Once"	Episode 19 "King in the North"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Five

Episode 1 "Fresh Off the RV"	Episode 2 "The Hand That Sits the Cradle"	Episode 3 "Working the 'Ween"	Episode 4 "Driver's Eddie"
Episode 5 "Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems"	Episode 6 "Sub Standard"	Episode 7 "Where Have All the Cattlemen Gone?"	Episode 8 "Cousin Eddie"
Episode 9 "Just the Two of Us"	Episode 10 "You've Got a Girlfriend"	Episode 11 "Driver's Eddie 2: Orlando Drift"	Episode 12 "Legends of the Fortieth"
Episode 13 "Grand-Mahjong"	Episode 14 "Cupid's Crossbow"	Episode 15 "Be a Man"	Episode 16 "Trentina"
Episode 17 "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'"	Episode 18 "Rancho Contento"	Episode 19 "Vice Mommy"	Episode 20 "Nerd Watching"
Episode 21 "Under the Taipei Sun"	Episode 22 "No Apology Necessary"

Fresh Off the Boat – Season Six

Episode 1 "Help Unwanted?"	Episode 2 "College"	Episode 3 "Grandma's Boys"	Episode 4 "S'Mothered"
Episode 5 "Hal-Lou-Ween"	Episode 6 "Chestnut Gardens"	Episode 7 "Practicum?!"	Episode 8 "TMI: Too Much Integrity"
Episode 9 "Lou Wants to Be a Millionaire"	Episode 10 "Jessica Town"	Episode 11 "A Seat at the Table"	Episode 12 "The Magic Motor Inn"
Episode 13 "Mommy and Me"	Episode 14 "Family Van"	Episode 15 "Commencement"