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"Nerd Watching" is the twentieth episode of the fifth season of Fresh Off the Boat. It first aired on March 29, 2019.
Synopsis[]
Tensions between Evan and Eddie run high as Evan's friends are wowed by Eddie's coolness when he starts hanging out with them, making Evan feel like a complete nerd. Louis and Jessica become convinced that Grandma is being scammed by an internet lothario in Chile.
Plot[]
To be added
Cast[]
Main Cast[]
- Randall Park as Louis Huang
- Constance Wu as Jessica Huang
- Hudson Yang as Eddie Huang
- Forrest Wheeler as Emery Huang
- Ian Chen as Evan Huang
- Lucille Soong as Jenny Huang (credited as Grandma Huang)
- Chelsey Crisp as Honey Ellis
- Ray Wise as Marvin Ellis (absent; credit only)
Recurring Cast[]
Guest Cast[]
Quotes[]
Evan: Edwyn Huang, I need the TV, pronto! Eddie: Oh, okay. No. Evan: Is that grape jelly? Eddie: PB&J burrito. Want a bite? Evan: What about beans, cheese, salsa? Eddie: All that stuff's in there, too, bro. Evan: Dear God. You're a monster. I need the TV. Eddie: My ass ain't moving. Every day after school, I make a bomb-ass snack and watch MTV. Evan: In other words, wasting time. Eddie: Whoa! It's not a waste! I learned everything I know from these videos. I didn't have a handsome, jacked older brother to teach me how to be cool. I had MTV. Evan: No, thanks. My letters of choice... Ah "P," ah "B," ah "S"... Ah PBS! Eddie: Can you just stop being a nerd for one second? Come on. Dude, this is both music and a movie. It's double art. Hits you in your eyeballs and your ear... balls. Evan: I prefer imagination – Theater of the mind. Eddie: Fine. Close your eyes, then. |
Eddie: Nice! Put on the most boring thing so she'll want to smooch ya. Evan: Zack is coming over, too. Eddie: Wait. So no making out? The two of you are just gonna watch bird TV? Evan: Yes. We're birders. We bird. Eddie: Dude, you're going to high school soon. This bird crap... Isn't gonna fly. It's gonna get you killed. Evan: Ed, in few days, a rare migration of the red-legged snail kites is flying through town, and if we're not prepped for the chase, I'd prefer death. |
Jessica: People who fall for scams deserve to feel humiliated. That's how they learn. |
Sicily: You're so lucky to have an older brother, Evan. Eddie: You hear that, Evan? Evan: Well, I know you have some important shopping to get to. Eddie: I'm in the market for a subwoofer. Zack: Really? I've been thinking about getting a woof-woof myself. You know what I'm sayin', homie? Sicily: Hey, why don't we all go together? Evan: Because Eddie's route goes through the cover-your-eyes part of the mall – Victoria's Secret, Spencer's Gifts, and the rest of the risqué. |
Louis: I got it! You and I fly to Chile, pose as FBI agents, and threaten Osvaldo with global fraud. I call it Operation Chile Explosion. I'm still brainstorming the name. Jessica: You need more brain and less storm. Louis, this isn't some criminal mastermind in Chile. This is a fatso in Des Moines, sitting in front of a computer, gobbling marshmallows. Louis: Oh, I don't know why we have to be size-ist about this, but sure, let's go to Iowa. |
Eddie: Z and Sicily, in the place to be. Sicily: That was a freestyle. Eddie: Evan's just getting ready, but you're welcome to join me. Zack: Sure. What'cha watchin', E-man? Eddie: Uh, this is a commercial for tomatoes. Zack: Dope. Eddie: But Yo! MTV Raps is what's on. Sicily: Oh. Maybe we can catch Wu-Tang! |
Eddie: I've been drawing Zack. Zack: I love it when you bust my yams, E. Evan: Can you guys quiet down the love-fest over there? We don't want to scare the red-legged snail kite. Eddie: Did you ever notice that every bird's just a body part and a color? "There's a purple-butt flapper." Um, "The rainbow-nut pheasant." Evan: That's enough! Louis: The red-faced lil' bro. Evan: You know what you call a bird that hangs out with birds three years its junior? A loser! Oh, you don't like that bird? Well, I got two more for you right here! [flips both his middle fingers] Yeeaaaaah! |
Eddie: I'm a loser? Evan: If you have to ask "Who's the loser?", it usually means it's you. Eddie: Coming from bird boy, that's rich. Evan: You're always trying to give me "hot tips" on how to be cool. Well, here's one for you – Instead of stealing your little brother's friends, find some your own age. Eddie: Well, I'm sorry for wanting to hang out with you. And FYI, those are women's jeans. Evan: No, they're Jordans! Eddie: Jordache. |
Jessica: You see, we thought Grandma's friend in South America was– Emery: Was a scam. I know. I wasn't really gonna give her my money. Jessica: Then why did you say you were? Emery: Dad told me to. Jessica: Well, what about finding your passion? Emery: That part was true. I did. But it's not helping people. It's acting! You totally believed me. Jessica: [to Louis] You turned our son into an actor! Flight attendant feels like an attorney compared to this! |
Louis: I'll admit, if I had been honest with my mom from the beginning– Jessica: Emery wouldn't want to be an actor. Louis: Well, that, and I wouldn't have hurt you... Or ruined her relationship with Osvaldo. Jenny: You did what? Louis: Ma, we thought he was scamming you for your money. Jenny: I was scamming him for free alpaca gear. I already flipped his gift for three times of what I sent him. Louis: What? But I thought you said Osvaldo made you feel so alive. Jenny: Yeah. Tricking morons is a rush. I've got a bunch of scams going. That's why I love Florida. So many old idiots. Jessica: Maybe you Huangs aren't so gullible after all. Louis: That's right. We're crafty. |
Eddie: Why are you listening to this? Evan: I'm using it to get you in here. Like a bird call. An Eddie call. Eddie: You mean like a mating call? Evan: Ew! Come on! I'm trying to tell you I finally understand why you like these music videos. I watched "Waterfalls," and it spoke to me. I totally related to it... How we should be comfortable with who we are and not chase something we're not. Eddie: That song's about HIV. Evan: Oh. Eddie: Yeah. Evan: Well, I'm sorry I called you a loser. I wish I could be like you... Fun, relaxed, instantly likeable. But I can't. You can be smart when you choose to, but I can never be cool. Doesn't work that way. Eddie: I thought that, too. But... after hanging out with you, I realized you're already cool. Evan: I am? Eddie: Yeah! Anybody with enough swagger to convince their friends to go bird watching is doing just fine. |
Eddie: You'll be just fine when I'm gone. Evan: Thanks, Eddie. Told ya you could be smart when you want to. Maybe I'm not the only bibliosapien in the family. Half-man/half-book. Eddie: Wait. Which half of me is book? I... I still have my, uh... "microphone," right? |
Gallery[]
Episodes
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| Fresh Off the Boat – Season One | |||
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| Episode 1 "Pilot" |
Episode 2 "Home Sweet Home-School" |
Episode 3 "The Shunning" |
Episode 4 "Success Perm" |
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| Episode 5 "Persistent Romeo" |
Episode 6 "Fajita Man" |
Episode 7 "Showdown at the Golden Saddle" |
Episode 8 "Phillip Goldstein" |
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| Episode 9 "License to Sell" |
Episode 10 "Blind Spot" |
Episode 11 "Very Superstitious" |
Episode 12 "Dribbling Tiger, Bounce Pass Dragon" |
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| Episode 13 So Chineez | |||
| Fresh Off the Boat – Season Two | |||
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| Episode 1 "Family Business Trip" |
Episode 2 "Boy II Man" |
Episode 3 "Shaquille O'Neal Motors" |
Episode 4 "The Fall Ball" |
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| Episode 5 "Miracle on Dead Street" |
Episode 6 "Good Morning Orlando" |
Episode 7 "The Big 1-2" |
Episode 8 "Huangsgiving" |
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| Episode 9 "We Done Son" |
Episode 10 "The Real Santa" |
Episode 11 "Year of the Rat" |
Episode 12 "Love and Loopholes" |
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| Episode 13 "Phil's Phaves" |
Episode 14 "Michael Chang Fever" |
Episode 15 "Keep 'Em Separated" |
Epsiode 16 "Tight Two" |
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| Episode 17 "Doing It Right" |
Episode 18 "Week in Review" |
Episode 19 "Jessica Place" |
Episode 20 "Hi, My Name Is..." |
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| Episode 21 "Rent Day" |
Episode 22 "Gotta Be Me" |
Episode 23 "The Manchurian Dinner Date" |
Episode 24 "Bring the Pain" |
| Fresh Off the Boat – Season Three | |||
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| Episode 1 "Coming from America" |
Episode 2 "Breaking Chains" |
Episode 3 "Louisween" |
Episode 4 "Citizen Jessica" |
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| Episode 5 "No Thanks-giving" |
Episode 6 "WWJD: What Would Jessica Do?" |
Episode 7 "The Taming of the Dads" |
Episode 8 "Where are the Giggles?" |
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| Episode 9 "How to Be an American" |
Episode 10 "The Best of Orlando" |
Episode 11 "Clean Slate" |
Episode 12 "Sisters Without Subtext" |
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| Episode 13 "Neighbors with Attitude" |
Episode 14 "The Gloves Are Off" |
Episode 15 "Living While Eddie" |
Episode 16 "Gabby Goose" |
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| Episode 17 "The Flush" |
Episode 18 "Time to Get Ill" |
Episode 19 "Driving Miss Jenny" |
Episode 20 "The Masters" |
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| Episode 21 "Pie vs. Cake" |
Episode 22 "This Is Us" |
Episode 23 "This Isn't Us" | |
| Fresh Off the Boat – Season Four | |||
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| Episode 1 "B as in Best Friends" |
Episode 2 "First Day" |
Episode 3 "Kids" |
Episode 4 "It's a Plastic Pumpkin, Louis Huang" |
| Episode 5 "Four Funerals and a Wedding" |
Episode 6 "A League of Her Own" |
Episode 7 "The Day After Thanksgiving" |
Episode 8 "The Vouch" |
| Episode 9 "Slide Effect" |
Episode 10 "Do You Hear What I Hear?" |
Episode 11 "Big Baby" |
Episode 12 "Liar Liar" |
| Episode 13 "The Car Wash" |
Episode 14 "A Man to Share the Night With" |
Episode 15 "We Need to Talk About Evan" |
Episode 16 "Ride the Tiger" |
| Episode 17 "Let Me Go, Bro" |
Episode 18 "Measure Twice, Cut Once" |
Episode 19 "King in the North" | |
| Fresh Off the Boat – Season Five | |||
|---|---|---|---|
| Episode 1 "Fresh Off the RV" |
Episode 2 "The Hand That Sits the Cradle" |
Episode 3 "Working the 'Ween" |
Episode 4 "Driver's Eddie" |
| Episode 5 "Mo' Chinese Mo' Problems" |
Episode 6 "Sub Standard" |
Episode 7 "Where Have All the Cattlemen Gone?" |
Episode 8 "Cousin Eddie" |
| Episode 9 "Just the Two of Us" |
Episode 10 "You've Got a Girlfriend" |
Episode 11 "Driver's Eddie 2: Orlando Drift" |
Episode 12 "Legends of the Fortieth" |
| Episode 13 "Grand-Mahjong" |
Episode 14 "Cupid's Crossbow" |
Episode 15 "Be a Man" |
Episode 16 "Trentina" |
| Episode 17 "These Boots Are Made for Walkin'" |
Episode 18 "Rancho Contento" |
Episode 19 "Vice Mommy" |
Episode 20 "Nerd Watching" |
| Episode 21 "Under the Taipei Sun" |
Episode 22 "No Apology Necessary" | ||
| Fresh Off the Boat – Season Six | |||
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| Episode 1 "Help Unwanted?" |
Episode 2 "College" |
Episode 3 "Grandma's Boys" |
Episode 4 "S'Mothered" |
| Episode 5 "Hal-Lou-Ween" |
Episode 6 "Chestnut Gardens" |
Episode 7 "Practicum?!" |
Episode 8 "TMI: Too Much Integrity" |
| Episode 9 "Lou Wants to Be a Millionaire" |
Episode 10 "Jessica Town" |
Episode 11 "A Seat at the Table" |
Episode 12 "The Magic Motor Inn" |
| Episode 13 "Mommy and Me" |
Episode 14 "Family Van" |
Episode 15 "Commencement" | |